Facing a fear and the blessings to come!

So about a week ago I was given the opportunity to face a fear of mine; flying in a small airplane.  I've had this fear for several years because of reports of small plane crashes.  2 of them included people whom I knew from a mutual friend/family member.  I didn't know the person(s) who died personally, just the mutual friend/family member.  Well, my husband and I have some friends who have been trying to get us to to fly with them for over a year now.  I have kindly declined each time.  This last week I was given the opportunity again. 

Each of my children but one and my husband were all able to go for a ride in our friends' Husky airplane.  When the last of the riders landed and it was only me and my 6 year old left, I was asked, "who's next?"  My 6 year old looked up at me and said, "Mom!  I can't go alone!"  My heart started racing, the ringing in my ear got a little louder and as I looked into that cute face, how could I say no, again?  I knew it was time to face my fear.

I was assured that once we started take off, if I was not handling it well, my friend would turn around immediately and bring me back.  That was the only thing that kept me going.  My cute little 6 year old was so excited, how could I turn us around just as we were starting?

The take off was smooth.  Despite that, I was shaking like crazy and my hands were tingly.  I forced myself to keep my eyes open and to point out things for my child to see.  We started to fly directly toward the mountain.  My friend/pilot said he wanted to show me something and asked how I was doing.  I said I was fine but I really didn't believe that!  Since I had mentioned to him that I've never seen a mountain goat in person, in the wild before, my friend wanted to help get my mind off of the flight to see if we could see mountain goats in the mountains we were flying over. 

At this point I was praying silently, "Please Heavenly Father, don't let me die today!  I need to live for my children and this child can't die today either!  Please calm me down so I can try to enjoy this experience."  In that moment, I realized I wasn't breathing like I should be so I took a couple deep breaths.  Immediately my heart stopped racing, my hands stopped feeling tingly, and I was calm.  I was finally able to look at the mountains and the beautiful view and actually enjoy the ride! 

I want to liken this experience to a gospel principle.  I know there are several that it could apply to but I want to do just one for now.  Our Heavenly Father knew that we could not make it through this life alone.  We need someone to help us through our trials and to also encourage us as we go.  We need someone to point out the good and beautiful things in our lives.  Those people are our family, our friends, our church leaders.  We ourselves can also be that person to someone else.  Once we rely on Him to get us where we need to be and we put all our trust in Him and in our Savior Jesus Christ, we can enjoy the beautiful ride!  Life can be happy and full of wonderful experiences!  We only need to trust our Heavenly Father and call upon Him to help us in our times of need and He will comfort us! 

I am so grateful for the opportunity to face a fear!  I'm grateful for what I learned from that experience.  I'm grateful for a loving Heavenly Father who knows us individually and loves us individually!  He knows our thoughts, our strengths, our fears and the desires of our hearts.  He wants us to be happy!  I love Him and my Savior Jesus Christ! 

Jacob and Esau

Don't you love it, or maybe sometimes not love it, when you're reading in the scriptures and you come across a verse or chapter that puts you in your place?  Well, lets just say this.  As a family this morning we were reading in the Old Testament about Jacob (Israel) and Esau.  We were at the part where Jacob gives Esau a gift to try to rebuild a terrible relationship from 20 years before.  In the end of that chapter it pretty much tells us that we need to serve our enemies, or our friends or family whom we are upset with.  Well, let's just say that I'm headed out to do a little service.  I needed put in my place today.

Heeding Promptings

I had an experience a little over a month ago that built my testimony about the power of listening to the warnings of the spirit tremendously!  I thought I'd share it with you!

It was a Friday and my friend Elaina and I were planning on doing a 12 mile run the next morning.  On my way into town with my family I all of a sudden had a little panic attack that something bad was going to happen.  I didn't know what it was or what it was related to so I just shrugged it off to my own crazy thoughts and put it out of my mind.  That night I didn't sleep well.  I tossed and turned and only got about 6 hours of sleep when I had to wake up to get ready for our run.  On our way up the mountain to where we would start our run, I had an uneasy feeling in my stomach.  I thought it was just because I didn't sleep well and that I thought I'd have a terrible run.  I put it out of my mind again.  Well, our run was going great!  I felt great and it was a beautiful day!  A little more than 1/2 mile or so away from the end of our run, we were coming to an intersection where we would turn right and onto a busy road for the last 1/2 mile stretch to my car.  Just before getting to that intersection I had the thought, "Cross the road and run against traffic."  Normally, my friend and I run in the direction with traffic because the shoulder is much wider and we can run a few feet off of the road.  Running against traffic has a smaller shoulder so we would be running right on the edge of the road.  A second time the thought came to my mind, "Cross the road and run against traffic."  So as we approached the intersection I was about to tell Elaina that we should run against traffic but she had had the same impression.  We crossed the road.  About a 1/4 mile down we heard a very loud noise coming up from behind us.  We stopped running, turned around and saw that a truck pulling a trailer that was filled with garbage and debris was coming towards us very quickly.  The trailer had come off of the truck and was barreling down the road behind it.  The tongue of the trailer was causing sparks and such as it went down the road until it finally turned right, into the dirt of the shoulder, and after several yards finally came to a stop about 10 feet off the shoulder of the road.  The trailer and truck had stopped right across the road from where we stood.  Had we been running on that side of the road, like we normally do, there is no doubt in our minds that we would have been run over by that trailer and seriously injured, or worse.  We would not have had enough time to get out of the way of that trailer. 

This experience has taught me to listen and recognize more carefully the promptings and warnings of the Spirit.  Sometimes it might be a panic attack!  Sometimes it might be a bad feeling or even a thought put in our minds.  I'm glad I finally listened that 4th and final time!  I'm sorry it took that many times to get through but I'm SO glad the Lord didn't give up on me!  I'm grateful that the Lord has given us the Holy Ghost to guide us and to protect us through our lives.  I know He lives!  I know He knows us individually and knows our needs and that we need to tell Him of our needs!  He may know them but he wants to hear it from us!  I love the Lord SO much! 

Blessed are they...

It never ceases to amaze me that the Lord knows us individually!  It's been on my mind lately that I want to be more righteous.  I want to be able to raise righteous children.  There are so many times when I have a hard time recognizing whether it's the Holy Ghost speaking to me or if it's my own thoughts.  When I do recognize that it's the Holy Ghost, WOW!  It's a sure feeling that I could never deny!  I just don't recognize it every time. 

I came across a scripture this morning in the Book of Mormon.  It's simple but it hit me like a ton of bricks today!  It's 3 Nephi 12:6  This is where the resurrected Jesus Christ has come back to his people in the Americas.  He's teaching them the Gospel and ordains 12 men to baptize.  Here he's teaching the Be-Attitudes.  This one specifically answered my prayer.

 "And blessed are all they who do hunger and thirst after righteousness, for they shall be filled with the Holy Ghost." 

So, as long as I continue to truly want to be righteous, to look for ways to be righteous, the Lord will bless me with the Holy Ghost!  I believe that not only will I be blessed with it, but I will also be more often able to RECOGNIZE it!  You can imagine my joy at having this scripture pop out at me the way it did and answer my prayers in the way it did!

An unusual blessing

First of all, does anyone even read blogs anymore??  If you do, I'd love to have you comment just so I know...

Today I realized that I've been blessed with a very unusual blessing.  It's not one that most people would even count as an actual blessing but I've recognized it for what it is today.  I've been blessed with a horrible memory!  Now, why in the world would anyone say that's a blessing??  Well, I'll tell you a little later on.  Here are some examples of my horrible memory.

I was terrible at tests in school because I could never remember what I studied.  If I'm given a task to complete I have to write it down or I'll forget about it.  Even though it happens every week, I seem to forget every time that my daughter has piano lessons.  Often times my husband needs me to do something and it seems like the second I get off the phone with him, I get distracted and I forget.  I just finish reading an amazing book and someone will ask me about it and I sit there and think, hmmm, I can't remember details to tell them!  I never remember what I read in my scriptures from day to day!  (Ok, maybe a little but not specifics!)

Well, here's where it comes as a blessing.  I forget specifics about events.  Like, when someone does something to upset me, I quickly forget about it.  I always remember my feelings though about that event, just not what happened specifically.  Here's an example.  One time my husband and I were discussing an issue and I became upset because he wasn't respecting my feelings regarding it (ya, I don't remember what issue it was!).  I told him that he does that all the time to me and he wanted an example.  I couldn't give him one.  I just remembered FEELING like that before with similar situations.

I always remember how I FELT during a situation where I was being hurt for whatever reason, just not why.  I know this is a blessing because I'm pretty sure I'd be a grudge holder otherwise!  I know a few people in my life who hold grudges for-EVER!  They remember everything and can't seem to let it go.  I'm glad I can't do that!

I had a situation recently where I had my feelings hurt by someone close to me.  I was talking to my husband and I told him that if they called, not to answer the phone because I needed to sort out why I was mad at them.  He said, "You don't know why you're mad?"  I told him no, that I know they've done this to me before and they would want specifics on times they've done it in the past, but I couldn't remember any to tell them!  I just remember FEELING like this several times before around them.  My husband then went on to remind me of other specific times!

I know I could hold grudges for simply remembering how someone has made me feel but whats the point if I can't remember why I felt that way?  I know that it can be a challenge to have such a bad memory but at the same time, I recognize it as a blessing to be a lot more forgiving towards others.

I'm so grateful that my Heavenly Father knows me!  He knows that I hate it when I've hurt someone whether intentionally or not.  He knows that I have to forget about things and just let them go in order to be happy.  He knows my weaknesses and my strengths and He helps me with them when I ask.  Yes, I'm hurting right now for how my friends made me feel, but I know I'll be over it sooner then later because I'll forget about it.  I've never felt like one should always confront someone who has wronged them if you can just get over it, not let it get you down, and move on!  I'm thankful that the Lord has blessed me with being able to do just that!

I know my Heavenly Father lives!  I KNOW He's near me, watching over me and wanting me to be happy!  My motto lately is to just "Choose to be happy!"  It is our choice to be happy.  We can choose to fester over things or we can choose to get over them and move on.  Well, MOVE ON!  Is life really worth living if you're unhappy all the time?

This is where I hope to be someday; at my Saviors' feet being taught.  Being told that I've done enough.  Being told, "Well done though good and faithful servant.  Well done."

If The Savior Stood Beside Me

This is such a beautiful song!  I have a hard time not tearing up when I hear this!  I am so blessed to be in my wards' primary presidency that I get to hear those angelic children sing this every week!

Click on the words "If the Savior Stood Beside Me."  Listen to the words.  It really makes me think how I would really act if the Savior stood by me. 

When Satan gets me down. Again.

This last week I was looking on-line for a Menier's support group to get some ideas as to what people eat, how they manage their symptoms, etc.  Well, that's how Satan got his hold on my emotions and brought me down!  All I read on there were the worse-case-scenarios, the horror stories, the hell of this disease.  It scared the daylights out of me!  I got off of there in a complete panic and emotional fit! 

Later that night I had my husband give me a blessing of comfort so I could put it all behind me and remember the priesthood blessings I've been given and the experiences in the temple I've had that my health would be good. 

I've had several reminders from my dear mother, a friend of mine, and my husband that the only support group I need is right in front of me!  The church, the scriptures, and the Lord.  Period!  I'll tell you what!  Satan found his way to squeeze in and boy was it a hard squeeze!  I don't need that negativity and I refuse to let it happen again!  I've been told by the specialist I saw, by my bishop in a very comforting blessing, and by my husband in several blessings that I would have good health through all of this and I plan to have it that way!  There is a lot of power in positive thinking and surrounding yourself with positive people, media, and faith. 

In the middle of all of this, I was led to a scripture that has truly given me comfort. 

Alma 37:37 "Counsel with the Lord in all thy doings, and he will direct thee for good; yea, when thou liest down at night lie down unto the Lord, that he may watch over you in your sleep; and when thou risest in the morning let thy heart be full of thanks unto God; and if ye do these things, ye shall be lifted up at the last day." 

Here are a few more that I like.

Luke 8:48 "...Daughter, be of good comfort; thy faith hath made thee whole;  go in peace."

Rom. 15:4 "For whatsoever things were written aforetime were written for our learning, that we through patience and comfort of the scriptures might have hope." 

Keeping your marriage alive and happy!

I saw this today and LOVED it!  I thought I would post it for everyone to see!  I do not know who the original author is.


Keeping your marriage alive and happy!

1. PRAY TOGETHER ALWAYS
2. READ THE SCRIPTURES TOGETHER ALWAYS
3. Go on regular date nights
4. Hide notes in secret places
5. Go to bed at the same time
6. Listen to music together-share ear-buds
7. Buy him gifts he will love
8. Revitalize the romance with intimate dates
9. Wear shirts that tell the world you love your spouse
10. Praise your spouse to other people
11. Read a marriage devotional
12. Sleep in his t-shirts
13. Renew your vows privately with whispers and memories
14. Renew them publicly with cake and bubbly
15. Go away together at least once a year


For Women Only
16. Hang pictures of the two of you around your house
17. Make his favorite dessert
18. Make sex a priority
19. Spend time apart occasionally
20. Learn to enjoy something he loves
21. Surprise each other
22. Meet him at the door
23. Text each other from across the room
24. Set reminders on your phone to remember him/her throughout the week
25. Call him right now and tell him you appreciate him

For Men Only
26. Leave work on time and come home early
27. Engage every day in meaningful conversation
28. Compliment each other
29. Take one day a month to make your spouse your total focus
30. Argue fair: avoid these words “you always” and “you never”
31. Kiss every day
32. Find tangible ways to serve your mate without complaining
33. Forgive quickly
34. Be honest.
35. Get on the same page: plan your budget together
36. Look your best as often as you can
37. Guard your marriage
38. Laugh together
39. When you are together-BE TOGETHER (take a break from phones, technology, etc)
40. Tell her she’s pretty, especially when she’s not feeling it

Both
41. Make each other breakfast in bed
42. Do her chores for her
44. Get a couple’s massage or host your own privately
44. Dance together-soft music (both of you alone) or rocking music with the kids
45. Exercise together- hikes, bike riding, etc
46. Choose not to be annoyed by an irritating behavior/disappointment from your spouse
47. Thank your spouse often even for the least reason or gesture
48. Lay in bed together and stare into each other eyes, without talking
49. Learn something new together-take an art class, cooking lessons, etc
50. Leave a sweet comment on the Facebook wall
51. Support each other’s goals
52. Bring her flowers/gifts (even when she says they are too expensive)
53. Wear something your spouse loves
54. Share furniture-sit in his lap
55. Fight for your marriage
56. Make a point to eat dinner together most days of the week.
57. Never let your spouse feel like they come second place to your career or any other thing.
58. Talk about your dreams and aspirations. Be supportive of each other and dream big together!
59. Maintain a united front as your motto: Meaning- “Me and you against the world.
60. Speak well of your spouse.

The Atonement

In Sunday School this month we have been learning about the atonement of Jesus Christ.  No one really knows exactly what happened during the atonement but the Savior himself said in Luke 22:41-44,

"He was withdrawn from them about a stone's cast, and kneeled down, and prayed, Saying, Father, if thou be willing, remove this cup from me:  nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done.  And there appeared an angel unto him from heaven, strengthening him.  And being in an agony he prayed more earnestly:  and his sweat was as it were great drops of blood falling down to the ground." 

I can't even imagine the physical, mental, and spiritual pain that he felt!  He even had the Spirit leave him! 

He did it for us!  For you!  For me!  He would have done it were I the only one living upon this earth.  That's how important it was for our salvation.  I am so grateful that I can have my burdens lifted because of it!  I can repent and have all that guilt taken away from me because of his atonement.  I know the Savior Jesus Christ is real!  I know He lives!  I know that he suffered in that garden so that I can repent and try each day to live a better life. 

The Atonement

Comfortings of the Spirit

Last month I saw a specialist in Salt Lake to get a diagnosis for the problems I've been having with my ear and with getting Vertigo.  The morning of, my husband and I decided to go through the LDS Salt Lake Temple.  We've never done a session there before so I was very excited to go!

There was a moment during the session when I felt a little off balance/dizzy sort of feeling.  It was a split second but it scared me and I didn't know if I was going to pass out right there in front of everyone.  I started to have a little panic attack.  I didn't tell Paul or anyone what was happening because I didn't want to embarrass myself.  A few minutes later I was still shaking, trying to take deep breaths, when I said a prayer in my mind.  I said, "Dear Heavenly Father, I need Thee to calm me down and comfort me!  I need Thee, in THIS moment, RIGHT NOW!"  Immediately, my body stopped shaking and I calmed right down.  It was the Lord that heard my prayer and blessed me in my time of need. 

Towards the end of that session, during a prayer, words were said that I knew were meant for me!  I knew the Lord knew of my concerns, my need to get an answer that day from the specialist, and my great desire to get over this anxiety that I'd developed over my symptoms.  The spirit was SO strong in that moment that I KNEW, without any doubt, that the Lord was speaking words of comfort directly to me.  I was going to be fine.  Everything was going to be okay!  This was a trial that I would be able to endure with His help. 

Later that day, after my appointment, everything WAS okay!  I'd received the answers I was looking for and the closure of having a diagnosis.  I was able to have the comfort that the Lord was mindful of me in my time of need.

 I KNOW that the Lord is mindful of us.  I KNOW that He is there and that He loves us!  It's not just a wishful thinking.  It's not just my mind hoping for some greater being.  This is a real knowledge!  I've physically felt His comfort and heard the whispering of the Spirit.  No one could ever convince me otherwise!  

Gratitude

 

 Today my heart is full of gratitude thanks to our Relief Society lesson.  I'm grateful for so many things but would like to list a few.

*My membership in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.  The knowledge that God loves me and knows me individually. 

*My wonderful, loving, patient and genuinely kind husband!  I love him more than anything in this world!  I couldn't live this life without him!

*My adorable children.  I love listening to them laugh!  I love the time we spend together.

*My parents.  For raising me to be who I am today.

*My mother and late father-in-law.  For bringing my husband into this world and for being wonderful examples on how I want to raise my own children!

*Siblings and in-law siblings.  I love my sisters and my brother so much!  I love my in-law siblings as if they are my own true flesh and blood!  We have so much fun together!

*Friends from the past.  Without them I wouldn't be who I am today.  Just to go into a little detail because I am feeling that gratitude towards them today.
    N taught me that there's more to life than high school immaturity.  He cared about me without knowing me very well or caring about my high school social status.  He made me realize that I am worth something more than popularity.  I had a much larger self-esteem after knowing him.
    A taught me that even through the years and through growing apart then coming back together again the friendship that started so long ago will always be there!  We'll love each other as sisters until the day we die.  I love her so much!
    S, N, A, D, and S all love me as their sister even if we aren't biologically related!  They taught me that you don't have to really be in the same family, to be family.  And C because he's my real brother who is my best friend!

    And finally, C taught me the true meaning of friendship.  Through all my imperfections he has never left my side (figuratively).  He's been a true friend for so many years.  I have tried to follow that example to be the best friend that I can be to those that mean so much to me!  To always be there for them when they need me most, no matter what.  I love him so much!

LDS President Thomas S. Monson said, "I mention an expression of “thank you” to one’s peers. The teenage years can be difficult for the teens themselves as well as for their parents. These are trying times in the life of a boy or a girl. Each boy wants to make the football team; each girl wants to be the beauty queen. “Many are called, but few are chosen” could have an application here.

The song frequently sung in the Sunday School of our youth placed the spirit of thanksgiving into the depths of our souls:

When upon life’s billows you are tempest-tossed,

When you are discouraged, thinking all is lost,

Count your many blessings; name them one by one,

And it will surprise you what the Lord has done. "

 

Christlike Love

A wonderful video of Christlike Love.  As I was getting ready for my lesson today, I came across this video portraying different examples of Christ and his love for people.  It really touched my heart today and made me want to try just a little harder to do better.  To have more Christlike love for people. 

Grateful today for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.

Joseph B. Wirthlin: It is wonderful to know that our Heavenly Father loves us--even with all our flaws! His love is such that even should we give up on ourselves, He never will. We see ourselves in terms of yesterday and today. Our Heavenly Father sees us in terms of forever. Although we might settle for less, Heavenly Father won't, for He sees us as the glorious beings we are capable of becoming.

Thomas S. Monson: Love is the catalyst that causes change. Love is the balm that brings healing to the soul. But love doesn’t grow like weeds or fall like rain. Love has its price. "God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life." That Son, even the Lord Jesus Christ, gave His life that we might have eternal life, so great was His love for His Father and for us.

What power, what tenderness, what compassion did our Master and Exemplar thus demonstrate! We, too, can bless if we will but follow His noble example. Opportunities are everywhere. Needed are eyes to see the pitiable plight and ears to hear the silent pleadings of a broken heart. Yes, and a soul filled with compassion, that we might communicate not only eye to eye or voice to ear but, in the majestic style of the Savior, even heart to heart.

Unexpected Blessing

I wasn't looking for a part time job but I was offered one. One of my best friends is good friends with a dentist who was looking for someone to work for him part time as his office manager. She told him about me and said he should hire me. I went in for an interview and started 3 days later. I work just 2 days a week so it's nice that I'm not gone all the time. One of those days that I work, Paul will be able to stay home and work on our property management stuff so I'll only have a babysitter for my kids once a week. I feel so blessed right now that the Lord is blessing us with this unexpected blessing. It's a great opportunity and will help us financially. I hate leaving my kids for those 2 days but knowing Paul will be there one of them makes it easier. My friend who referred me will watch them the other day. She's such an amazing friend! I love her so much! I'm so glad she listened to the spirit and referred me. She's a blessing to us and I hope I can be a blessing to her someday!


2 Nephi 9:3

3 Behold, my beloved brethren, I speak unto you these things that ye may rejoice, and lift up your heads forever, because of the blessings which the Lord God shall bestow upon your children.

Ephesians 1:3

3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who hath blessed us with all spiritual blessings in heavenly places in Christ:

Saints in Saskatchewan, Canada

Janet Kruckenberg

---

Saints in Saskatchewan, Canada

The treeless 252,000-square-mile province of Saskatchewan, located in central Canada, has been called by some “the forgotten place on the Canadian prairie.” Latter-day Saints in Saskatchewan feel anything but forgotten, however, as unexpected spiritual blessings have come their way in recent years.

The latest unexpected blessing came in October of last year. At the fall stake conference, a new stake was to be created—the Regina stake. The Saskatoon stake, which had been the only stake in Saskatchewan since its creation 24 years earlier, was to be changed to the Saskatoon district, in spite of members’ best activation and missionary efforts. The Saskatoon stake members were disappointed, but “we all were prepared to return to district status, accepting this as the will of the Lord,” said Eric Slocombe of the Saskatoon Second Ward.

Then Elder Russell M. Nelson of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles came to preside at a special stake conference on 27–28 October. During the Saturday session of conference in Regina, Elder Nelson created the Regina Saskatchewan Stake, as planned.

On the morning of the Sunday session of conference in Saskatoon, as Elder Nelson was conducting interviews prior to selecting the new president for the Saskatoon district, he excused himself in order to pray in private. Upon returning, Elder Nelson proceeded with the interviews and selected a new president. During the conference session, Elder Nelson surprised everyone when he announced not a new district president but a new stake president for the Saskatoon Saskatchewan Stake.

“There was no oxygen left in the room because everyone in the audience gasped when they realized that a district was not being created but that they still had their stake. Then the tears came,” said Milton Derry, first counselor to Brother Slocombe, who was called as the new Saskatoon stake president.

An earlier unexpected blessing for members in Saskatchewan came in August 1998, when President Gordon B. Hinckley visited Regina, Saskatchewan’s capital city, to speak to local members. As President Hinckley directed his remarks toward temple building, members listened eagerly, knowing the Church President was announcing the construction of many new temples at that time.

They were hoping, recalls Joanne Thomson of the Regina First Ward, that President Hinckley would announce a temple for Winnipeg, Manitoba, a likely city for a temple because many Latter-day Saints and the Canada Winnipeg Mission headquarters are located there. Winnipeg is 357 miles (571 km) from Regina, but that would still be closer than the 434 miles (700 km) Regina members were accustomed to traveling to the Cardston Alberta Temple.

When President Hinckley announced that a temple would be built in Regina, “there was a huge collective gasp, and then the tears started,” said Sister Thomson. “No one ever suspected a temple would be built in Regina, here in the middle of nowhere.”

The Regina Saskatchewan Temple was dedicated on 14 November 1999.

Today, the nearly 5,000 members living in Saskatchewan are doing all they can to be worthy of their temple and their two stakes—working together in missionary efforts, supporting each other, and performing family history and temple work.—Janet Kruckenberg, Wahpeton Branch, Fargo North Dakota Stake

Saskatchewan, Canada

First baptism: 1913 Today’s members: Nearly 5,000 Units: 2 stakes, 8 wards, 10 branches Temple: Regina Saskatchewan

2nd Opinion

Last Friday I got vertigo, again. I went to my P.A and he gave me a steriod shot which has helped. He recommended I get a second opinion. So, I went to a different ENT on Monday for a 2nd opinion on my ear. He made me feel somewhat better about everything just because he has a few different ideas. Right now I'm doing a sinus rinse and sprays to keep them clear. I came out of the appointment feeling better although he said that we can't completely rule out Menier's Disease (you'll have to look it up to understand it all.). Even though I felt a little better, I couldn't shake the what if's. I was pretty sick about it all just not knowing. Today I went in for another hearing test. My hearing is still bottomed out. I'm deaf in my right ear. No change to that but I did ask some pretty detailed questions to my audiologist. I love that guy! He cleared up so many questions for me and even confirmed that he feels like my previous ENT has done everything he thinks he should have done, and that this new ENT is doing what he should as well. He cleared up my questions about Meniers which made me feel SOO much better! He said I don't fit the profile of a Meniers patient and that he firmly believes that my situation is being caused by a virus. The good news is that it can be treated. I won't gain my hearing back, but I can get relief from the Vertigo and dizziness. He can't give me a diagnosis because that has to come from my ENT but between all 4 Dr.'s in this case, I finally felt a little hope today.

If you read this blog, please include me in your fasting and prayers! I need to have this virus treated so I can move on with my life; adjust to the hearing loss and focus on keeping my left ear healthy. I said a very fervent prayer on my way to the audiologist that I would receive good news. My hearing isn't coming back but I felt that everything else that I learned was good news in a different way. The Lord heard my prayer! He blessed AND comforted me during that appointment! I KNOW he answered my prayer! I KNOW He loves me and wants me to be happy. I'm trying so hard to read my scriptures daily, to say my morning and evening prayers, to be a better mom and wife, and to be better in my callings. I'm trying to attend the temple more regularly. I KNOW the Lord sees my efforts and that I'm being blessed because of them.

Vertigo. Again.

Wednesday started out as a normal day. Paul was home so we went to lunch and little grocery shopping together. Later that night at 7:00pm I started to feel motion sick. I thought that was strange since I'd been home for 3 hours and was feeling fine until that moment. Well, it didn't get any better. It got worse. For the next 2 hours I spent most of it trying to throw up. I finally forced myself to but I didn't feel any better. I finally called my doctor. He said I had Vertigo. Again. Seriously?! I was so upset! He said it was probably caused by the cold I've had for several weeks. He gave me a few things to try and said if it didn't get any better, to go into the hospital for a steroid shot. By 9:30 I was nervous and scared that it would affect my good ear. So Paul called our friend Hyrum and he came over to help Paul give me a Priesthood blessing. The last time I had Vertigo it lasted for 5 days before I got on anything for it and it continued for several more. I went into the doctor yesterday morning at 9am and was given a steroid shot. By early afternoon the dizzyness was gone. The nausea was gone by this morning.

I know that by the power of the Priesthood I'm feeling good less than 2 days from the initial onset of the Vertigo. I know the Lord loves me and wants me to be happy. I know He's there and that he hears our prayers. I know the power of the Priesthood is real! I've been witness to it too many times in my life to ever deny it.

Still here

It's been a while since I've posted anything. Spiritually I've hit a low I've never hit before. Even after Pres. Uchtdorf spoke about the forget-me-nots I've still had a hard time not thinking that the Lord has forgotten about us. I know I know better but it's still hard to keep my head up when nothing has happened. Paul still hasn't found a better job and I still haven't gained any hearing back. Well, the one thing I HAVE been trying to do is reflect on the blessings that I DO have right now. Paul DOES have a job and I DO have hearing in my other ear. We have 5 wonderful and healthy children. We have the gospel of Jesus Christ.

One of my best friends, whether she knows it fully or not, has subtly helped me through this dark time in my life. Last week she gave me a few scriptures to read which helped, really helped, to break me free of this dark time. At least spiritually. She helped me to recognize when the spirit has spoken to me and that I need to have faith and hope in the Lord through these trials.

Doctrine and Covenants 6:14-16, 21-24, 33-37

14 Verily, verily, I say unto thee, blessed art thou for what thou hast done; for thou hast ^ainquired of me, and behold, as often as thou hast inquired thou hast received instruction of my Spirit. If it had not been so, thou wouldst not have come to the place where thou art at this time.

15 Behold, thou knowest that thou hast inquired of me and I did enlighten thy ^amind; and now I tell thee these things that thou mayest know that thou hast been ^benlightened by the ^cSpirit of truth;

16 Yea, I tell thee, that thou mayest know that there is none else save God that ^aknowest thy thoughts and the ^bintents of thy ^cheart.

21 Behold, I am Jesus Christ, the ^aSon of God. I am the same that came unto mine ^bown, and mine own received me not. I am the ^clight which shineth in ^ddarkness, and the darkness comprehendeth it not.

22 Verily, verily, I say unto you, if you desire a further witness, cast your mind upon the night that you cried unto me in your heart, that you might ^aknow concerning the truth of these things.

23 Did I not speak ^apeace to your mind concerning the matter? What greater ^bwitness can you have than from God?

24 And now, behold, you have received a ^awitness; for if I have ^btold you things which no man knoweth have you not received a witness?

33 ^aFear not to do ^bgood, my sons, for whatsoever ye ^csow, that shall ye also reap; therefore, if ye sow ^dgood ye shall also reap good for your ^ereward.

34 Therefore, fear not, little ^aflock; do good; let earth and hell combine against you, for if ye are ^bbuilt upon my rock, they cannot prevail.

35 Behold, I do not condemn you; go your ways and ^asin no more; perform with soberness the work which I have commanded you.

36 ^aLook unto me in every ^bthought; ^cdoubt not, fear not.

37 ^aBehold the wounds which pierced my side, and also the prints of the ^bnails in my hands and feet; be faithful, keep my commandments, and ye shall ^cinherit the ^dkingdom of heaven. Amen.

I've had a hard time lately recognizing if certain thoughts are my own or from the Spirit. These verses helped to clarify that and I DO know that the Lord hears my prayers and that he'll bless us eventually, with those righteous desires as long as we're doing our part. We must continually be trying to reach a new spiritual level for ourselves. Today I was reading the December issue of the Ensign and decided to take this challenge. I know it'll make it easier to see my blessing through my trials. So I'm going to record it here for my own reflection.

Gratitude Challenge

10 physical abilities you are grateful for.

1. Running. I love to run! I can't imagine my life without being able to run.
2. Hearing. I am SO grateful that I still have 1 good ear to hear my children's laughter. To hear my husbands loving voice. To hear our Prophet speak to us. To hear inspirational music.
3. Playing with my children.
4. Reading. I love to get caught up in a good novel! I love to read my scriptures.
5. Touch. I love to cuddle with my husband. I love to hug and hold my children. I love to kiss their cheeks!
6. Smell. I love the smell of my children after they've had a bath! I love the smell of fresh baked bread. I love the smell of fresh bloomed lilac bushes!
7. Sight. I love to watch my kids play together(on the days they're getting along!). I love watching my husband work. He's a hard worker and loves building things!
8. Playing the piano. I've played since I was 4. I love sitting down and getting lost in playing beautiful songs.
9. Laughing. I love to laugh! It brightens any hard day!
10. Singing. I love to sing! I have a fear of singing a solo in front of people but I'll do a duet any day with someone! I'll sing my heart out at my piano when no one is around!

10 material possessions you are grateful for.

1. My home.
2. My piano.
3. My scriptures.
4. My books.
5. My running shoes.
6. My car.
7. My clothes.
8. My bed. I LOVE LOVE LOVE flannel sheets!
9. Clocks. I hate being late to anything!
10. My yard. I have a large yard with tons of trees, hammocks, picnic tables and garden. It's a sanctuary.

10 living people you are grateful for.

1. My husband.
2. My children.
3. My parents.
4. My in-laws.
5. The prophet of our church.
6. Marcia Lynn McClure. (I love getting wrapped up in one of her books!)
7. Emi, Shayla, Stephanie, Tara, Alycia. I'm being 1st name specific because you mean so much to me in my life right now! I love you! (this does not exclude others who have touched my life at other times!)
8. My siblings.
9. Grace Wilson. She's my 3rd grandmother who loves my family like her own!
10. My cousin Cortney. Thanks for teaching me a lesson on never ending faith, hope and patience!

10 deceased people you are grateful for.

1. Jesus Christ. How could we be here without Him?
2. Grandma Koon. Such a great example of acceptance of others!
3. Grandpa Fielding. One of the best examples of hard work I've ever seen!
4. My father-in-law, Dan Ellsworth. My life is better simply because I had the blessing of knowing him for 2 short years.
5. Beethoven. My first reason for my love of music!
6. Joseph Smith. The restored Gospel of Jesus Christ is on this earth again because of him!
7. Steve Jobs. Thanks for inventing the Mac computer and the iPad! Enough said! :)
8. My great grandpa Roy Fielding. One of the best examples of forgiveness I know!
9. Jeff Richards. Benjamin on 7 Brides for 7 Brothers. My first movie crush and the reason I love musicals so much!
10. Whoever first invented chocolate! Thank you...


10 things about nature you are grateful for.

1. The smell of pine.
2. Cool lakes.
3. Trails to hike and run on.
4. The smell of lilacs (yes, I'll say it again!)
5. The smell of rain.
6. The view of the mountains out my window.
7. Trees to climb in.
8. Apple trees, nectarine trees, and avacado trees!
9. Warm beaches and the sound of the ocean.
10. The sound of birds in the morning summer sun.

10 things about today you are grateful for.

1. Being able to go to church.
2. Partaking of the sacrament.
3. The Sunday School lesson.
4. The Relief Society lesson.
5. Choir practice.
6. Relaxing on my bed all afternoon!
7. A nap that I don't normally like taking.
8. Time with my family.
9. Quiet time with Paul.
10. Hearing my children's laughter while playing together.

10 places on earth you are grateful for.

1. My home.
2. My parents' home.
3. Nyssa, OR.
4. Cancun, Mexico.
5. Seattle, WA.
6. Washington, D.C.
7. Florida.
8. McCall, ID.
9. Pittsburgh, PA.
10. My grandparents' homes.
(These are all the places I've made the best memories!)

10 modern inventions you are grateful for.

1. My computer.
2. My Bosch.
3. My treadmill.
4. My TV.
5. Chocolate factories.
6. Book publishers.
7. Electricity.
8. Indoor plumbing.
9. The internet.
10. My car.

10 foods you are grateful for.

1. Nectarines.
2. Chocolate.
3. Steak and potatoes.
4. Seafood.
5. Coconut.
6. Angel Food Cake.
7. Oranges.
8. Bananas.
9. Homemade bread.
10. Fresh Raspberries.

10 things about the gospel you are grateful for.

1. The Atonement.
2. The Sacrament.
3. Forgiveness.
4. The Scriptures.
5. The Temple.
6. The Plan of Salvation.
7. The Restoration of the Gospel.
8. Relief Society.
9. Primary.
10. The Priesthood.


I'm grateful for being able to reflect on these things. Most of them aren't in any particular order and they are the first things to come to mind. Some of them I had to think about for a long time but I'm very grateful for all that I have and I know the Lord will continue to bless me! This list will probably be different if I did it again in another year or even another month but it doesn't make me any less grateful for those things that might not be on this list again. I love the Lord and the many blessings he has blessed me with!

Forget-Me-Nots

On Sunday, President Dieter F. Uchtdorf of the 1st Presidency of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, gave a great analogy of Forget-Me-Nots. This picture sums up his talk. I needed to hear this talk! It was as if he was speaking directly to me. I have felt so alone lately. I've been feeling like the Lord has forgotten about us. I've been trying to put on a happy face for everyone because I don't like attention. I don't want people doting on me when I need to be the one to figure it all out for myself. I've been trying to find happiness in the scriptures and other areas but really, I've just felt really alone and forgotten. I cried when I listened to President Uchtdorf speak. It really hit home and I'm trying to apply it to my life so I can be happier. I had it DVR'd on my TV so I've watched it again. I've cried each time. It has just meant so much. You can watch it here. It's so much better to watch it but a summary is below.

President Uchtdorf Reminds Sisters of Five Things to “Forget Not”

“No matter how dark your days may seem, no matter how insignificant you may feel, no matter how overshadowed you think you may be, your Heavenly Father has not forgotten you. In fact, He loves you, with an infinite love.”

President Dieter F. Uchtdorf, Second Counselor in the First Presidency, gave this loving reminder during the General Relief Society Meeting on September 24, 2011.

Using the forget-me-not flower as a metaphor for his remarks, President Uchtdorf noted that although the flower is small in size, and easily unnoticed among larger flowers, it is still beautiful and vibrant.

President Uchtdorf tied the five petals of the forget-me-not flower to five things women should not forget.

Forget not to be patient with yourself:

President Uchtdorf reminded women that everyone has strengths and weaknesses—that no one is perfect, even those who may seem so.

“God wants to help us eventually turn all of our weaknesses into strengths, but He knows that this is a long-term goal,” President Uchtdorf said. “It is OK that you are not quite there yet. Keep working on it but stop punishing yourself. “

“Dear sisters, many of you are endlessly compassionate and patient with the weaknesses of others,” he added. “Please remember also to be compassionate and patient with yourself.”

Forget not the difference between a good sacrifice and a foolish sacrifice:

President Uchtdorf defined an acceptable sacrifice as giving up “something good for something of far greater worth.”

“Dedicating some of our time to studying the scriptures or preparing to teach a lesson is a good sacrifice. Spending many hours stitching the title of the lesson into homemade potholders for each member of your class may not be.”

President Uchtdorf noted that every situation is different, and suggested asking, “Am I committing my time and energies to the things that matter most?” in order to distinguish between good and foolish sacrifices.

Forget not to be happy now:

Using an example from the book Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, President Uchtdorf described how one of the characters, Willy Wonka, hid golden tickets within chocolate bars, promising to reveal wonders to five people who discovered the tickets.

“In their anxiousness, people began to forget the simple joy they used to find in a candy bar. The candy bar itself becomes an utter disappointment if it does not contain a golden ticket,” President Uchtdorf said. Whatever a “golden ticket” may represent to each person, President Uchtdorf warned Relief Society sisters to not put their happiness on hold as they wait for a future event, or golden ticket, to appear.

“The lesson here,” he said,” is that if we spend our days waiting for fabulous roses, we could miss the beauty and wonder of the tiny forget-me-nots that are all around us.”

Forget not the “why” of the gospel:

President Uchtdorf said that sometimes, in the routines of daily life, the vital aspects of the gospel of Jesus Christ are unintentionally overlooked. “We sometimes see the gospel as a long list of tasks that we must add to our already impossibly long “to do” lists. We focus on what the Lord wants us to do and how we might do it, but we sometimes forget why.”

President Uchtdorf reminded the sisters that the gospel is not an obligation, but a pathway leading to happiness and peace in this life and “glory and inexpressible fulfillment” in the life to come.

Forget not that the Lord loves you:

In closing, President Uchtdorf said, “Just think of it: You are known and remembered by the most majestic, powerful, and glorious being in the universe! You are loved by the King of infinite space and everlasting time.”

“You may at times feel a little like the forget-me-not—insignificant, small, or tiny in comparison with others,” he said, noting: “I hope (the forget-me-not) will be a symbol of the little things that make your lives joyful and sweet.”